Step right up singles...

Discussion in 'Films, TV, Music, Books, Etc.' started by BlackStar, Feb 3, 2011.

  1. UghRochester

    UghRochester https://www.twitch.tv/ughrochester

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    That'll do pig, that'll do.
     
    #21
  2. Chris_Crime

    Chris_Crime Rookie

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    My body is ready.
     
    #22
  3. BlackStar

    BlackStar Rookie

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    *inserts electricthunder*
    Say hello to Mizz RIGHT!





    Randy Jackson's writer
    [​IMG]

    Wait, you thought Randy Jackson from American Idol made up all those "YOU MY DAWG" quotes on the spot? Of course not! He's got a talented writer who writes his dialogue for him! And that writer just happens to be a lonely female looking for love this Valentine's Day. Say hello to Amy Tan; she also wrote some stupid book called The Joy Luck Club but I've never heard of it. Good luck buddy!










    *Inserts Lentium*
    Hey man, alright let's see who we have for you...





    Lady Gaga
    [​IMG]

    Well I guess this settles it, Lady Gaga is NOT a man.... Although to be honest the machine can sometimes get confused. Ohhhh, wait a second, I forgot she's not a man, she's a hermaphrodite. Oh okay, then yeah that's cool. She's got both parts so I guess you could say she's a chick who acts like one of the boys! All the best!










    *inserts DocMoc*
    for our doctor on the GR forums the machine has selected....





    A sexy nurse
    [​IMG]

    Heeeey, not bad Doc, you scored a nurse! This lovely nurse enjoys explosions and other forms of destruction. Maybe take her out to a monster derby. Don't mind her scars, in fact I'm sure they'll make great conversation as she explains to you how she got them! All the best for you date!










    *inserts WickedLiquid*
    Alright Liquid, let's take a look at who you'll be taking out on a date this Valentine's Day...





    A Reverse Mermaid
    [​IMG]

    You like liquid, and so do mermaids, It's a match made in heaven! A reverse mermaid might not be as attractive, but she's more practical, amirite? Swimming is a perfect date, just head on down to the ocean and she'll be waiting for you!










    *inserts Chris Crime*
    Ahhh, I wonder how the machine will ever decide who is right for you Chris, I guess we'll find out right now....





    Blockbuster manager Maya
    [​IMG]

    Congrats Chris, you got one of the last remaining surviing managers from Blockbuster! I'd suggest watch a movie but she's probably seen everything. Why not go out skating? Like in Happy Gilmore where Happy takes that girl out on a date and says if she misses shooting the puck into the net she's gotta give him a kiss and she gets it in and she kisses him anyway! AWWWWWW <3


    [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG][​IMG][​IMG][​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
    For over 20 years Blockbuster, and, now, Blockbuster.com have been delivering quality entertainment at a modicum price.
    Now they're delivering that same experience to your front door.

    Blockbuster.com has all the latest releases-like Inception-28 days before the other guys, so why go anyplace else?
    [​IMG]
    "Why wait?"



    Get your Movies, TV Shows and now Games delivered-FREE!

    [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG]

    Blockbuster.com Because those other guys are super faggots!


    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]




    [​IMG]






    BLOCKBUSTER name, design and related marks are trademarks of Blockbuster Inc. © 2010 Blockbuster Inc. All rights reserved.
     
    #23
  4. Gunner37

    Gunner37 Rookie

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    Sign me up
     
    #24
  5. De-Ting

    De-Ting Rookie

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    Me too, again.
     
    #25
  6. Chris_Crime

    Chris_Crime Rookie

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    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
    My literal reaction. My body was not ready

    A redhead, dude. Appreciate it, bro!
     
    #26
  7. BlackStar

    BlackStar Rookie

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    *inserts Gunner37*
    Moving right along, we've selected someone more compatible with you than eHarmony could ever find....





    An insane, obsessed Twilight Fan
    [​IMG]

    You might not be Edward, but you're good enough for Ericka here. Look forward to a night of all things Twilight. She's got EVERYTHING from Twilight bed sheets to a lock of Robert Patterson's hair... next to a vial of Robert Patterson's blood.... next to Robert Patterson tied, gagged and drugged with a black eye. She's probably not going to want to leave the house so stay in and watch a movie.










    *inserts De-Ting*
    Never mind "me too, again". I made the rules very clear and now I've told the old lady what a mean person you are and she's gossiped to all the other gals! But chin up dude, I've got a lovely date for you this V Day!





    Yoko Ono
    [​IMG]

    Looks like you got the woman who broke up The Beatles, ummm, congrats? She's big into conceptual pretentious art that goes over my head. I'd suggest going out for some plums served in perfume served in a man's hat (yes I stole that from The Simpsons). But if things get serious between you two please learn to give each other space, don't bring her every God damn place you go to and call it art, that's all I ask. ENJOY YOUR DATE!
     
    #27
  8. MattAY

    MattAY Forum Moderator
    Staff Member

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    Haha! Keep going, for the sake of comedy.
     
    #28
  9. De-Ting

    De-Ting Rookie

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    Mean? MEAN?! YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME WHEN I'M MEAN!

    But still, I can dig it.
     
    #29
  10. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    Am I the only one who thinks it's hilarious that a best selling writer has resorted to writing material Randy Jackson can use on American Idol? ROFL!

    And thanks for the date, I'll be sure to bring some fish food for her..... :?
     
    #30
  11. Nurgey

    Nurgey Rookie

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    Mememe!
     
    #31
  12. danielrbischoff

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    Why do I feel like this entire thread was a lead up to this massive advertisement.

    GR does not support Blockbuster........ until they buy some ads.
     
    #32
  13. Gunner37

    Gunner37 Rookie

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    Well it could have been worse i mean at least she is a girl thanks blackstar
     
    #33
  14. Chris_Crime

    Chris_Crime Rookie

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    [​IMG]
     
    #34
  15. electricthunder

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    Mine's hot..lol. Oh well, at least I can have a writer now :D
     
    #35
  16. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    <_<
    >_>
    <_<

    *submits name*
     
    #36
  17. kapow

    kapow Regular

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    MY TURN
     
    #37
  18. BlackStar

    BlackStar Rookie

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    Sorry folks, what can I say? Life > GR But better late than never right? Looks like we have 3 more people who I will hook up a date for today!!!!


    first up *inserts Nurgey*
    For you on this fine day we have....





    An angry soccer mom
    [​IMG]

    She's single and looking for someone special but for the love of God don't go to her son's soccer game. She's ruthless to the bone. I'm pretty sure this pic was taking after she shot a guy for congratulating his son who was on the opposing team. Remember, if she asks you about her son he's the best at everything, even the things that he can't be good at because it would contradict the other things. Okay man? Good luck.










    Next up we have Bret
    *inserts Bretimus_v2*
    Alrighty buddy, let's hook you up with your date for today! The machine has selected....




    A World of Warcraft Avatar
    [​IMG]

    Um, sorry man. I'm getting short on women so you will be going on a virtual date on WoW with a girl who goes by the name LuluCrazy4U_1982. I'm guessing she was born in 82? I dunno, makes sense right? Anyways, you guys will have a lovely time exploring the ummm *looks at sheet* Zui'Drak... did I pronounce that right? I'm sure she's a lovely girl just don't come off as a noob and she may fall for you. Be sure to invite me to the wedding at the Crystalsong Forest!









    Last but not... first... it's Kapow
    *Inserts Kapow*
    Today you'll be going out with....





    Katy Perry
    [​IMG]

    WTF? I can't get Katy Perry! This machine is screwed up! I... oh wait, it's a Katy Perry blow up doll






    [​IMG]

    Okay that makes more sense. Sorry, I should've read the whole thing! Today you'll be going out with you very own Katy Perry blow up doll. She takes 10-15 minutes to inflate and comes with a variety of wigs for you to choose from. Have fun you big stud you!














    And there we have it folks, another Valentine's Day is upon us and I've hooked you all up with dates on this magical day! May you all have a wonderful time! AND REMEMBER, NO REFUNDS
    *takes all your money and runs for the exit*
     
    #38
  19. De-Ting

    De-Ting Rookie

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    I'd take the Katy Perry doll anyway, because I could smack it and tell it how badly it sings without getting in trouble with the media.
     
    #39
  20. TheDiesel

    TheDiesel Rookie

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    This is ridiculously hilarious.

    Sign me up.
     
    #40

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