My Latest English Lesson

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Mortel3

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Copied from MY MSN SPACE: http://spaces.msn.com/blizzardbridge

So we were doing a debating thing, and the topic was "Cockroaches are a very good thing" - and the class had to choose who would debate the topic and if they were positive or negative. Naturally they were all looking for a good laugh, so they picked me :D. The negative speaker argued in a very formal language alll about how diseased-ridden Cockroaches are, and I had no idea what nice thing to say about Cockroaches, so I decided to purposelly fail, but with STYLE. This is what I said:
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Hello Class.
Cockroaches are so freakin awesome. Not only do they shoot rainbows from their butts, but do you know they are the heroes behind the most fantastic historical events?
Who caught Saddam Hussein? That was Cockroaches. And do you know who really drove the luna lander for a safe touchdown on the moon? NOT the Americans (bah!), it was Icky the Cockroach. Who was brave enough to sink the Titanic and kill all those damn British? One Cockroach and a really big screwdriver.
Who will one day cure world hunger? Cockroaches.
Who created the A-Bomb? Cockroaches.
Who made fluffy bunnies and those custard filled tarts that I love so much and are so damn awesome? Cockroaches!!
AND FINALLY, WHO created the Heavens and The Earth, and who will be the last surviving race when the nukes go off? COCKIES, so give Cockroaches a go, or they shall smite you where you stand. Thankyou.
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Everyone cracked up as expected, and when the teacher asked who they thought should win, the "Josh" chants started.
So that was my little taste of popularity for the month, and it was thoroughly enjoyed.
Im off to play N64.

EDIT: ZOMG you cant say Cockroaches.
 

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