That morning wizz

Discussion in 'Films, TV, Music, Books, Etc.' started by WickedLiquid, Jan 4, 2014.

  1. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    That first morning pee when you wake up and head to the bathroom, it's a great way to start the day. I was wondering though if this has ever happened to you...

    You have to go so bad it shoots out of you like a fire hose. And then instead of going in the bowl it overshoots and makes a mess on the seat. Then you have to take some steps back in order to aim it right. Well this morning was extra powerful. It was so bad I had to step out side my bathroom (the toilet faces my bathroom door). I was at the friggin 40 yard line with a super soaker between my legs.

    Yes I know this thread is a little TMI. But has that ever happened to you guys or should I be concerned?
     
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  2. used44

    used44 Forum Moderator
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    I can't be the only one who is so sleepy (and too lazy for/can't find my glasses) during my early morning pee that I sit down like a girl, right?
     
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  3. Affen

    Affen Rookie

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    Well this morning.. or night I had one of those "where the hell it is shooting" moments. I didn't even hit the can, it was a right curve straight to the sink cabinet. Even after re-adjusting aim it was hard to hit the target.

    Can urethra get tangled if it's held in a bad position for too long.
     
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  4. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    Well at last you're not peeing in the shower.
     
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  5. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    Well at last you're not peeing in the shower.
     
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  6. Green_Lantern

    Green_Lantern Forum Moderator
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    Just use the shower.

    It all goes to the same place.
     
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  7. UghRochester

    UghRochester https://www.twitch.tv/ughrochester

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    Oh here we go. GL had to bring that into discussion.
     
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  8. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    All over my feet still grosses me out.
     
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  9. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    This.

    Also I can't hold it long enough to strip and get a shower going when we have a bowl designed for that in front of me.
     
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  10. danielrbischoff

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    It goes to the ocean! How could you make dolphins drink that stuff?
     
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  11. De-Ting

    De-Ting Rookie

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    No, you're not. I got tired of having to wipe up the spray, so I squat all the time, now.
     
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  12. used44

    used44 Forum Moderator
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    It's so much easier. I'm already basically nude. I don't even have to fully wake up. Which is ideal because my bladder happens to always wake me up 30-40 minutes before I need to be up.
     
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  13. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    You sitters can GTFO. This thread is for men who stand in front of the toilet and piss with their hands on their hips, letting God himself guide their spray while singing "now you're a man! Man! Man! Man!"

    I'm also glad none of you thought my morning was odd. Perhaps the internet has something to do with that though.
     
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  14. De-Ting

    De-Ting Rookie

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    If I owned a waterfall urinal, that would be the case. However, I'm too clean and attractive to let myself leave an unappealing mess in a lavatory.
     
    #14
  15. Longo_2_guns

    Longo_2_guns Forum Moderator
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    I usually take a leak while I wait for my shower to heat up. It takes about 45 seconds to heat up, which is about my average morning pee length.
     
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  16. Gunner37

    Gunner37 Rookie

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    I usually just go in the shower because I always shower after I get up instead of some people I know that shower only at night
     
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  17. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    I love everything about this thread.
     
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  18. MattAY

    MattAY Forum Moderator
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    Haha, that has never happened to be Wicked. You need a plumber.

    I used to sit down in the morning because I'm so tired, but once I woke up in a little puddle of wee - no joke. So now I ALWAYS stand.
     
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  19. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    On the plus side I've been told women assume that somehow the sound of the piss hitting the water equals the size of ones penis. Which is retarded since we don't assume a girl has a large vagina if she's pissing like a race horse. But hey, I'll take it.

    In reality it's not the size of your bladder it's how you use it.
     
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  20. MattAY

    MattAY Forum Moderator
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    Wicked has the schlong of a black donkey, people.
     
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