I never buy anything that the people I'm buying for asked for. Everyone I buy for except my girlfriend have more than enough money to buy themselves anything they want any time they want. So just buying them something on their list is zero fun to me, seeing they'll just buy it on boxing day if they don't get it anyway.
So I have fun trying to find gifts that they will absolutely love but had no knowledge of beforehand. I'd say I have about a 70% success rate. Some fall flat but most are very well received. Have a lot more fun shopping this way, and it's a lot more personal.
As for how much I'll spend, I plan to spend less this year. I always get carried away. $100 per person, $200 for the GF is my limit this year.
As for merry Christmas vs. happy holidays, I will always say Merry Christmas. That's what I'm celebrating and I'd like you to know it. Feel free to say Happy Hanukkah, or whatever you're celebrating back. If you get offended by my saying Merry Christmas, I do not like you so I do not care. Simple enough.