Relay-Ting: Week 15

[De-Ting]

So this is me taking over The People Speak and putting it in the forum where it'll get more attention. This thread is for funny and/or impacting quotes of comments posted all over GR. I'll be taking both entries from everyone via PM and I'll be posting my own favorites. This was originally all about what I think is funny. I'm actually giving you the privilege of contributing to it. Privilege.

I'm sure you're wondering about prizes. I have very few lined up to start, and I'm really not in a position to be adding any more. Unless I work out something with Danny and the other staffers, the only rewards being given out here will be laughs and huzzahs. Prizes are for whoever has successfully entered the most quotes featured, or whoever has had their quotes featured the most.

I intend for this to be a weekly thing, but I will update it whenever I feel like it. Do not ask to see more content if it's been less than a week since the last update. Prizes will not be weekly, however. They will be given out monthly if available.

--Rules for submissions--

* You have to PM the quote to me, along with the url of the source page.
* The quote must contain the poster name(s) (for forum posts, just click Quote, remove text if necessary, and the copy pasta it to the PM).
* Send any number of quotes, but don't go crazy with it. If you try entering every little thing that could come off as funny that ever gets posted around here, you will receive very disturbing mental images of things you didn't even know you were afraid of.
* You MAY quote yourself. However, if you keep sending me everything you ever post because you think you're super-amazingly hi-ho-larious, nothing you submit, or anyone submits from you, will ever be included in this thread again.
* Do not send repeat submissions. If it doesn't show up, it's not going to.
* Do not send me stories. This is specifically for quotes. It must be posted somewhere on GR before you can quote it.

You may post comments, but don't feel like you have to. The less clutter there is, the easier it will be for readers to find the actual content.

 

[Bretimus_v2]

Save on postage and just hand deliver everything to me.

 

[De-Ting]

If you win, you can come to my house, Bret. But not vice versa.

 

[Bretimus_v2]

Why not? I have candy...

 

[danielrbischoff]

Good luck dude. I'm glad people enjoyed it when I was doing it every weekend, but I'm trying not to work on Saturday and Sunday anymore (I don't get paid for it) and there really wasn't a lot of participation. Who knows, maybe this will be like Futurama or Family Guy. God speed De-Ting! I'll send anything I see your way.

 

[Longo_2_guns]

I never bothered, because no one ever nominated me when I was being hilarious. Which was always.

Truthfully, I sorta liked the whole "ask a question, front page the answers" format better.

 

[Bretimus_v2]

I liked the Bretimus week. #ego stroked

 

[TheJx4]

What's the point of TPS?

I mean, I got nominated for a COLDPLAY pun, you guys obviously don't know what funny is.

 

[danielrbischoff]

The point was to sort of grow and incubate the commenting and the forums and the whole community. I'd say it worked to a point, but then after that point it didn't work.

 

[TheJx4]

The point was to sort of grow and incubate the commenting and the forums and the whole community. I'd say it worked to a point, but then after that point it didn't work.

I liked it, I just think the lack of...functionality on the main site didn't help.

 

[De-Ting]

~Week 1~

Since I received no entries, these are all my picks.

First off, a witty observation from cyberjim:

MattAY tells a joke:

There's an English man, Irish man and a Scotsman. They're being chased by a policeman. They see this old warehouse so they run in. Inside there are 3 empty sacks on the floor. They each jump in a sack. In comes the copper and see's these three bundles on the floor. Goes up to the first one and kicks it. The English man shout out, "Woof Woof", and the copper thinking it's just an old dog leaves it and kicks the second sack. The Scotsman yells out, "Me-ow me-ow", he leaves this one as well thinking its just an old cat. He walks over to the last sack and kicks it, and the Irish man yells out.. "Potatoes Potatoes..!"

Longo expresses his feelings about air travel:

I usually hate getting stuck next to Napoleon, conqueror of armrests.

Bretimus shares something so funny, it makes it's way into two signatures:

On the toilet...that's where I read books. If it weren't for twosies, I would be illiterate.

And the front page feature; Bretimus tells Keri what he thinks about MLP fans::

It's not often I say things like this...and it's with a bit of shame...but it needs to be said. This Manifesto post makes me want to punch you in the face, figuratively speaking.

---
Didn't see what you wanted to? Make sure to PM it to me in quote format before a week has passed, and it'll have a better chance of being featured.

 

[Longo_2_guns]

PM's are so gay.

 

[Bretimus_v2]

Good choice, Ting, I love that image.

 

[danielrbischoff]

Haha, cyberjims was excellent. All great selections!

 

[De-Ting]

~Week 2~

Got the first submission from Dan this week, from the front page:

I would not expect to see Valve's offerings anywhere but Steam. Right now, Origin is a piece of crap that EA can get away with because of their incredibly desirable IPs.

If you had told me that there would be a console war WITHIN PC gaming ten years ago, I would have laughed. Now I just cry.

HK-47 responds to becoming Darth Vader in MattAY's sprite comic:

Hope my suit has a built-in toilet.

intoTheRain's pooper attracts some funny remarks:

Yeesh, hope everything comes out OK....

Didn't you read, daniel?

It didn't.

Oregon Trail pioneer Lien requests some of Danny's free oxen:

Good timing, my ox died on me.

And used44 shares something magical with the community:

http://batmanrunningawayfromshit.tumblr.com/

 

[De-Ting]

~Week 3~

No submissions this week.

Ninja Nick_Tan responds to Angry Birds Space. Buy, try, or die?

Die, because birds die in space. Moving on...

Quidboy plays mind games with us.

Where's Waldo?

Now, we rant aboot Canada.

I enjoy calling Soccer "Football" just to piss off the NFL enthusiasts.

I enjoy calling Soccer "Football" just to piss off the CFL enthusiasts.

All 3 of them?

The who? What new organization is this?

Canadian football. It's like American football except the ball is made from Beaver skin and the losing team wins a "we're all winners at heart" trophy.

Never knew we had that. Always thought it was about hockey, lacrosse, hockey, curling, hockey and hockey.
How is the Moose team faring this year?

Which one?

WickedLiquid: There are four, thanks. Just because one of them used to be american doesn't mean that we can ignore his current citizenship.

I like Canada - it tries so hard.

And gets so far?

 

[danielrbischoff]

Yeah Nick's one liner was pretty good this week.

 

[De-Ting]

~Week 4~

Lots of submissions. Hooray!

From: danielrbischoff
UpAndAtThem tells us what he thinks about Angry Birds.

Stupid copycats...
Falco's been an angry bird in space since 1993.

From: danielrbischoff
Quidboy has a slight malfunction.

Kim Corn Karn

Later...

lol, stupid keyboard has to put the M right beside the N!

It's also funny to see people vote for Kim when his name in the pic says Kin. You people don't even know who these underdogs are either, do you? :shock:

From: LawnGnome
tinymhg imagines what a free-to-play Skyrim-esque experience will look like.

Fus Ro *Please Enter Your Credit Card Number*

From: UghRochester
Witty banter on the front page. usaglory asks GR:

If you could hire one of your regular visitors who would it be and why?

Me. Beacause everybody else would look so good in comparison, and I work for peanuts.

Tiny because everyone needs that one old person at the door to the store saying welcome

 

[Bretimus_v2]

I love that usaglory, tiny, edd banter.

 

[De-Ting]

~Week 5~

So yeah, this week was slow and boring.

Here's a fantastic video: http://youtu.be/OolgyIrs0Qc

From: drathbone
Longo sees your preorder to kill Hilter, and raise you:

If you pirate it, then you get to kill Blackbeard instead.

Then some random crap.

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Didn't like this week? Neither did I. Send some submissions and it'll all get better...