1) Denial There's no way this happened. There was a mix up. It's George W Bush all over again this thing was rigged. 2) Anger What the fuck is wrong with you Americans? Half of you idiots didn't even vote. You did this to yourselves! 3) Bargaining This will be ok. He'll have an administration who will make sure he doesn't blow up Canada because Justin Trudeau made fun of his hands. 4) Depression Oh who am I kidding. I don't even wanna go to the US anymore. There was so much I wanted to see; I wanted to go to Vegas, Hawaii, NYC again. But what's the point? 5) Acceptance Ah well. At least it's not Kanye.