Genital Squeezing at the Airport

Discussion in 'Films, TV, Music, Books, Etc.' started by Eyebrowsbv31, Nov 16, 2010.

  1. MattAY

    MattAY Forum Moderator
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    Not everyone is Jackie Chan.

    Do you want them to take away your priveleges like itouches and laptops? Who the fuck hijacks a plane with an itouch as a weapon!? The arabs cant afford them anyway, so were fine.
     
    #21
  2. used44

    used44 Forum Moderator
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    I find that people who are against the body scans and more intense screenings are the same people who are (secretly or not) in favor of racial profiling. They think, "Hey I'm not brown! I speak English! Why are they searching me!?"
     
    #22
  3. madster111

    madster111 Rookie

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    Who needs to be jackie chan?
    Simply don't be weak, then swing said boot directly at the neck. If you hear a sharp crack, you can probably dial back the power a little bit. All you need to do is collapse their airway.


    And of course not, but at the same time i don't see why they take away anything at all when almost anything can be turned into a weapon. 'Bombs' can be made out of effectively anything with batteries and Ceramic knives can be easily brought on. They don't look twice about carrying 5kg of swingable solid object on.

    So, why arent i allowed a coke or nail clippers?
     
    #23
  4. FrozenBacon

    FrozenBacon Veteran

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    You can bring drinks on planes, just not through security. Im guessing the reasoning for this is because you can put an explosive liquid in a container and pass it off as water, or soda.

    The rest of your ideas are just outlandish. Do you really think you are better qualified than experienced professionals to keep these airplanes safe?
     
    #24
  5. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    Why do you need to carry on nail clippers in the first place, if you were properly grooming yourself beforehand you could eliminate this item.
     
    #25
  6. Wes

    Wes Rookie

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    Have you ever suffered from a hangnail Bret? I don't want to wait till the plane lands to buy nail clippers at the duty free shop and snip that sucker off. I wanna do it the moment it bothers me!!


    I was thinking MacGyver.
     
    #26
  7. madster111

    madster111 Rookie

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    Yes, considering i can spot a weapon better than them.

    Oh no, a swiss army knife! He might stab someone.
    What's that sir? Yes, you can take that laptop on the plane.

    Answer me this,
    What will cause more damage:

    1.) 5kg of solid object swung at someones head with enough force to break through concrete with a sledgehammer
    or
    2.) A small knife, wielded by an untrained person / wielded by a trained person
    or
    3.) A large ceramic knife, wielded by a trained person
    or
    4.) A bar of chocolate baked with [insert poison here] and offered to other passangers?

    Hint:
    Only number 2 is not able to be taken on an aircraft.
     
    #27
  8. MattAY

    MattAY Forum Moderator
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    I think were all forgetting that Madster is a sociopath here.

    We should just leave him to his fantasy world.

    Not once in the entire history of the world has someone been poisoned by a chocolate bar. It's too much effort to kill just one guy. And what if he doesnt want any chocolate - your hijack is screwed! And you commit suicide in the most embarassing way possible in the arabic world...without taking anyone with you.
     
    #28
  9. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    haha, that turned my good Friday morning into a great Friday morning.


    Also Chocolate is poisonous for dogs. So if they used a dog as the secret marshal and the terrorists fed him chocolate we'd be in a lot of trouble.

    I don't know about you but I wouldn't feel safe knowing chocolate was on my plane and cop dog was hungry...
    [​IMG]
     
    #29
  10. GiftedMonkey

    GiftedMonkey Rookie

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    ^Easy way to incapacitate bomb-sniffing dogs then bring bombs on the plane. Or incapacitate fruit-sniffing dogs and bring fruit on a plane. Now comes the part when madster says he could totally kill a pilot and hijack a plane with a sackful of figs.
     
    #30
  11. Bretimus_v2

    Bretimus_v2 Hey kiddo!

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    That's nothing. I once made C-4 from nougat.

    True story.
     
    #31
  12. WickedLiquid

    WickedLiquid Regular

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    Actually, if you get a mouth full of nougat, all you need is a straw and you've got a deadly gun you can shoot at people by spitting it out through the straw. All you need to do is chew it into small pieces then aim for the three pressure points on the back of the neck.

    I think we should spend more taxes so all our pilots can wear this...

    [​IMG]

    That way we'll feel better knowing they'll be safe against nougat attacks, killer boots and Vulcan death grips.
     
    #32
  13. madster111

    madster111 Rookie

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    Excellent.

    Then i shall be the first person to kill with chocolate.
     
    #33

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