Three doofuses blunder their way through Divinity Original Sin 2

Discussion in 'Heart of the Revolution' started by Starling, Mar 12, 2018.

  1. Starling

    Starling Novice

    Apr 3, 2013
    Likes Received:
    On a boring saturday evening, one of my friends suggested to our closest friend circle Facebook chat group that we ought to buy Divinity Original Sin 2 and play it in coop. After a bit of discussion I and another friend decided to go along and few hours later we had downloaded the game and set up our Teamspeak channel for chatting but I seemed to have a problem: my friends didn't seem to be able to hear me. I checked Windows sound settings to see if mic even works but everything was okay on that end. Eventually I looked into Teamspeak settings and discovered that... I had accidentally set the push-to-talk button as my mouse's left click...

    Quick fix later we were in the game and started crafting our characters. "This will take at least an hour." said one of my friends. "Totally" I responded. "There goes our evening" added the third. But after a while our characters were ready! Two humans, one a cleric and another a scoundrel and my undead necromancer were ready to be a total menace to the Divinity society! I neglected to tell my friends though that I had secretly picked a talent that causes my body to explode upon death and neglected to tell them, just to dick with them in combat.

    So our adventure began and less than a minute into the game I managed to steal a book and failed to talk myself out of it. "Uhhh, guys.... I fucked up." I admitted to my friends when the angry guards descended upon us and delievered a rather swift justice. A good hearty laugh later we had reloaded a save point and embarked on our adventure this time without pissing off every NPC in sight... at least for now. Except I had to go away to take care of an urgent IRL matter and when I returned ten minutes later everything was on fire and I had missed all the important events. Rushing through the level I finally caught up with my friends and we successfully finished the prologue.

    After a short trip we reached the first town hub and immediately stuck our nose into a group argument where one mean dude was trying to extort money from an elf. My friend said the wrong thing and we got into a fight on the elf side. Things were a bit messy and when my turn arrived, I of course used my main offensive spell which was flaming daggers. Except I didn't know who was the enemy so i threw them out rather randomly and someone had dropped a big puddle of poison on the ground which resulted in a big explosion. When the combat ended we emerged victorious! Except the elf and her companion had also perished in the blaze and we had left a big puddle of blood and flaming corpses in the middle of the town. While we wondered why no one cares what we had done, we took a quick group selfie in front on the smouldering corpses to celebrate our victory. (PS: Later I discovered that one of our victims had been a recruitable NPC companion that we had brutally murdered which made it even more hilarious in hindsight)

    Then we set off to exploring the town and my scoundrel friend immediately spotted a merchant who had left her pants in the open in her tent. We immediately developed a cunning scheme in which one of us distracted the merchant while the scoundrel went and stole her stuff! When he had departed with her stuff, I let the merchant off the hook who then discovered that her stuff was gone! Who could have done such a dastardly thing!? Of course she immediately blamed me! Me! How dare she! But I denied my involvement and as a proof let her look into my bags. Satisfied that I hadn't taken anything, she went to look around the tent if there isn't anyone else there. But my scoundrel friend had in the meanwhile pulled on her pants and then went to flaunt them in front of her. Of course she noticed that and demanded her stuff back. My friend tried to lie his way out of the situation but she was too sharp to fall for it. Such a shame. She seemed like a decent person. Her smouldering corpse left into the tent, we embarked to perform our cunning scheme on every merchant that had something useful left out into the open and this time didn't stick around to flaunt our new assets in front of our victims.

    Soon we were rich in booty and felt like kings, then got our asses kicked from some poisonous gigantic frogs in a cave. Swearing to have our revenge later, we embarked on the main quest which involved getting off the island and agreed to help some NPC dude with his plan which involved getting a teleportation device from a lair of killer crocs (for the first time I used my raise corpse spell which turned a corpse of a crocodile into a writhing mess of meat and bones which irked us something fierce and prompted a choir of "Uuuugh"s and "Ewwwwww"s).

    The teleportation device turned out to be a pair of gloves which gave teleportation spell. Since I am the group mage, it was given to me and of course I tried it out on my friends by dropping one on the other with the spell for laughs. We also used the gloves to reach secret areas and gathered some additional loot before returning to the guy who had given us the quest. He led us to a cliff where he asked me to teleport him to a ledge. Misunderstanding his instructions I instead dropped him off the cliff. Whoops. He shouted at me angrily and then ran off, full of piss and vinegar. My friends wanted to see where the quest would go, so we reloaded. This time I teleported him to the right place and he teleported me to him, then asked me to teleport him across the ravine. I teleported my friends to my location and then the NPC to where he wanted where he... gloated at me and told me to find my own way out and then ran off. What a dick! You see, the gloves allow you to teleport the others but not thyself. But with friends like these, I teleported them across and then gave them the gloves allowing them to teleport me over the ravine as well.

    All on the other side we found ourselves in a port which was filled with enemies two levels above our level. We failed at sneaking and took them on in a fight... and lost it promptly. We considered going back but then I found a way through by carefully observing the enemies and then managed to sneak across. One of my friends made it across as well but the third one got caught. Upon the attempt number three we finally made it across and ran into the villain who had attacked us in the prologue. We happily assaulted her and... got our asses kicked. She turned out to be a rather fierce opponent. We nearly beat her but then I used my poison wand on her... which healed her... because apparently she was undead like me. That and her immunity to magic made me completely useless in the fight and so it was left to my two friends to fight her while I adviced them on stratagems and with our united effort they finally managed to down her. With that achievement on our belts we decided to take our new levels and pay back to the frogs who had "wronged" us. Of course after all we had been through it was an easy fight. Celebrating our successes we decided to call it a night.

    That was quite a night to remember and really made me look forward to playing Divinity Original Sin 2 with my friends again.
    Jason Faulkner likes this.

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